Couples Therapy & Marriage Counseling in St. Paul, Minnesota

When Your Relationship Matters Too Much to Keep Going in Circles

Relationships can bring out the very best in us—and, when things go wrong, sides of ourselves we hardly recognize.

Maybe you’re having the same argument again and again. Maybe you’ve stopped arguing because you’ve stopped talking about anything that matters. Maybe there’s been an affair or another betrayal. Or perhaps you’re simply wondering how two people who love each other ended up feeling this far apart.

Couples therapy can help.

I’m a Licensed Marriage and Family Therapist specializing in couples and relationship therapy in St. Paul, Minnesota.

I’m also a marriage- and relationship-friendly therapist. If you want to make your relationship work, I’ll be behind that effort 100%.

And if you’re not sure what you want yet, that’s okay too.

Request Appointment

 

When Your Relationship Is in Trouble

Sometimes couples come to therapy because something has happened that can’t simply be ignored.

An affair. A betrayal. Talk of separation or divorce. A conflict that has gotten badly out of hand. Or years of hurt and resentment that have finally become impossible to live around.

You may feel as though you need to decide immediately whether the relationship can be saved.

Usually, we can start somewhere simpler.

We slow things down.

We figure out what’s actually happening between you.

We look at the patterns that keep taking over, what each of you is trying to protect, and why conversations that begin with good intentions so often end somewhere neither of you wanted to go.

Then we work on changing them.

Or Maybe 90% of Your Relationship Is Pretty Good

You don’t need to be contemplating divorce to benefit from couples counseling.

You may love each other, enjoy your life together, and still have that same maddening argument you’ve been having for ten years.

Maybe it’s about money. Sex. Parenting. Work. In-laws. Who carries the load. Or whether one of you ever actually listens to the other.

Sometimes the subject changes but the argument underneath it stays remarkably similar.

Couples therapy can help you understand that pattern before another ten years go by.

Couples Therapy Is Different

Couples therapy isn’t simply individual therapy with two people sitting on the couch.

There are two people in the room—and there’s the relationship between them.

That’s why couples and relationship therapy are the primary focus of my private practice.

I pay attention not only to what each of you tells me, but to what happens between you in real time: how you reach for each other, how you miss each other, where defensiveness enters, when somebody shuts down, and how an ordinary disagreement becomes the argument you know all too well.

I’m not going to sit silently while the two of you recreate that argument for an hour.

I’ll be involved.

I’ll slow things down, ask questions, interrupt when necessary, help translate what’s getting lost between you, and occasionally point out something neither of you particularly wants to hear.

Therapy should be compassionate.

It should also be useful.

Learn why I specialize in couples therapy:

A Solo Private Practice Specializing in Relationships

No Shame. No Blame. No Wasted Sessions.

Most couples don’t need another person deciding which one of them is the problem.

They need help understanding what happens between them when the relationship is under stress.

Together, we’ll work to understand the deeper patterns behind the problems you’re experiencing and find practical ways to change them.

I work with couples dealing with:

• Recurring arguments and communication problems
• Emotional distance and loss of connection
• Affairs, infidelity and rebuilding trust
• Sex and intimacy concerns
• Marriage and relationship crises
• Separation and questions about divorce
• Relationship discernment and clarity
• Premarital counseling
• Longstanding patterns that haven’t changed despite your best efforts

You don’t need to agree about what the problem is before coming in.

In fact, most couples don’t.

Marriage- and Relationship-Friendly Counseling

If you’re coming to therapy because you want to save your relationship, I take that seriously.

Relationships can recover from difficult things.

That doesn’t mean I’ll pretend every relationship can or should continue. Sometimes one or both partners genuinely aren’t sure. Sometimes the work is about determining whether—and how—the relationship can move forward.

But I’m not casually neutral about a marriage that two people want to repair.

I’ll help you give that effort an honest chance.

Couples Counseling in St. Paul

Minnesota Marriage Counseling is my solo private practice focused primarily on couples and relationships.

My office is located at:
821 Raymond Avenue, Suite 440
St. Paul, MN 55114

You don’t need to have everything figured out before scheduling.

You don’t need therapy vocabulary.

And you don’t need to know exactly how the two of you got here.

Bring the relationship you actually have.

We’ll start there.

Request Appointment